The Rules for Starting Over

If this post didn’t contain a single word other than the title that would still pretty well sum up the rules for starting over. 

There are no rules for starting over.

No requirements. No limitations. No reason you can’t. There is no right way or wrong way. There is just your way. You can start over whenever and however you want.

You may think you’re “too old” to begin again but consider these people who had the same thing said about them: 

Andrea Bocelli didn’t start singing opera seriously until the age of 34. Some “experts” told him it was too late to begin.

Phyllis Diller became a comedian at the age of 37. She was told by many club owners that she was “too old” to become a success.

Julia Child didn’t even learn to cook until she was almost 40 and didn’t launch her popular show until she was 50.

Harlan Sanders, the Colonel Sanders of Kentucky Fried Chicken fame, was 66 when he began to promote his style of cooking and create an empire.

Each of these individuals had three things in common: they wanted more out of life than they were getting. They believed in themselves when others might have had doubts. They made a decision to begin again. 

Anyone who can make a decision can start anew! 

All that it takes is a decision that says my life is not heading in the direction that I thought it would so I’ll change directions now. It takes a decision and a commitment to do something different than you are doing now. 

This much is certain; if you want tomorrow to produce a different result than the one you have now then you’re going to have to do something different. You need to know and acknowledge that “different” requires change and it will likely be a moment by moment fight to accept the change. 

Here are just a few thoughts if you’re thinking you would like to steer yourself in another direction.

To start over you may need to admit your role in getting yourself where you are today. Until you accept responsibility for what you have, where you are, and why you made the decisions you did it will be very difficult to do anything differently. 

Consider what and who has held you back and decide immediately to eliminate or lesson their impact and influence on your life. Be honest with yourself, not every “friend” is truly a friend. Future success is not just about what you start doing, it may well be even more about what you stop doing.

Take some time to plan and strategize. Decide what you’re willing to invest and when you’re thinking investment don’t just think about money, think about time too. Change takes time, learning new habits takes time. Don’t underestimate the importance of budgeting time to eliminate old habits and replace them with new ones.

Dreams have no age limits but our minds often do. If you think you’re too old the first thing you need to change is your mind. 

Once you do that anything is possible. 

14 thoughts on “The Rules for Starting Over

  1. Starting over, for many, can be a lonely place.

    In their minds they’ve failed. Feeling embarrassed. Weak. Just not good enough.

    Whenever I have a coaching client that’s started and stumbled I ask one question: “What did you learn?”

    One client hired me after hitting numerous speed bumps in his last business.

    In the first coaching convo, I gave them space for their BMW moment (Bitching Moaning and Whining) I said: “Wow, you did a fantastic job figuring out how NOT to run this business.”

    “I guess you can look at it that way.” they replied in a puzzled tone.

    Then we got busy. After six months, they were flying high, soaring, having fun in the new business.

    1. Great comment Steve. It amazes me how many people want a “do-over” but don’t want to do anything different.

      The good news is that do-overs are unlimited but there really isn’t any point to them if we just keep doing the same dumb stuff.

      And you’re spot on about the feelings of failure. It helps when the realize that some of the biggest success stories grew out of some of the biggest failures.

  2. Reblogged this on Natasha Foreman Bryant, MBA and commented:
    This post by Steve Keating is simple yet so powerful. Simple in the fact that it’s common sense, and powerful because most of us lack the common sense to do what Steve suggests.

    How many of us have struggled with starting over, even when we see there are no other viable options? How many of us fall deeper down the ‘rabbit hole’ because we fear starting over while at the same time fear where our current path will take us? Many people are depressed because they fear starting over, they fear the unknown, they fear falling deeper than where they are—but the paralysis is slowly eating away at their existence. They are missing out on life because fear is consuming them.

    Lack of movement will cause us to atrophy and then eventually whither away. Let’s move. Let’s take the necessary steps to start over. Thank you Steve for sharing this amazing message. It has inspired me to share with others. It has inspired me to look in every area of my life and see where I need to start over.

    ~Natasha Foreman Bryant

    1. Thank you Natasha for your wonderful comment. I agree 100%! If my own life, whenever I’ve fallen short or failed to do what I really knew needed to be done, it was fear that held me back.

      It’s not that successful people never fail, successful people indeed fail, they are just not afraid of it. They will fail as often as it takes to succeed. Once we dig deep for the confidence to “fail well” there really is little that we can’t accomplish.

      The key is to begin…

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