Here’s Why You Need a Mentor

I have been blessed to have had outstanding mentors throughout my life. They have had a positive impact on both my personal life and my professional life. They have willingly given me their time and life experiences to help me be a better version of myself. And they have done that while expecting nothing in return except an effort on my part to continually improve. 

No matter where you are in life or your career a mentor is incredibly important for personal and professional growth. The role of a mentor goes beyond providing guidance; they act as a trusted advisor, supporter, and source of wisdom. Here are some of the ways a mentor could have a positive impact on your life this very day. 

  • Mentors typically have more experience and expertise in a specific field or domain. They can share their knowledge, insights, and practical tips that may not be readily available in books or courses. This can help the mentee learn faster and avoid common pitfalls.
  • A mentor can provide personalized guidance tailored to the mentee’s unique goals, strengths, and weaknesses. Unlike generic advice, a mentor can identify areas for improvement and help the mentee develop a personalized action plan.
  • Having a mentor who believes in your potential can significantly boost your confidence. They can encourage you to take on challenges. They can help you see your progress. They provide constructive feedback, which can be invaluable in building self-assurance.
  • Mentors often have extensive networks within their industry or profession. Through their connections, mentees may gain access to new opportunities, potential collaborators, or valuable resources.
  • A mentor can offer career guidance and help with navigating the complexities of professional life. They may offer advice on career choices, skill development, and strategies for advancing in one’s field.
  • Effective mentors not only focus on professional development but also on personal growth. They can help mentees improve their soft skills, such as communication, leadership, and time management. Those are essential skills for business. They are also essential skills for life.
  • Mentors provide an objective viewpoint, free from personal biases or emotions that friends or family might have. They can give honest feedback. They challenge the mentee when needed, and help them see situations from different angles.
  • Mentors can hold their mentees accountable for their actions and progress. They can assist in setting realistic goals and provide encouragement and motivation to achieve them.
  • Mentors often share their own experiences, including mistakes and failures. This allows mentees to learn from these experiences, avoid repeating similar errors, and develop resilience in the face of challenges.
  • Mentors often take a long-term interest in their mentees’ success. They are invested in the mentees’ growth and development, providing support even as the mentees progress in their careers.

It would not be at all unusual for you to have more than one mentor in your life at a time. One for professional growth, one for personal growth and maybe even one for financial growth. Mentors make a difference for the people they mentor. 

If you’re not sure how to find a mentor then start by looking around. Who are the people you most admire? Who are the people who you think of as successful? Who are the people you would be proud to be like? Ask those people if they would be willing to invest the serious time required to mentor you. Ask them if they would be willing to help you be your best self. 
You will know you’ve asked the right person when you receive an enthusiastic YES.

If the person you ask is hesitant or can’t commit the time don’t try to “sell” them on the idea. It isn’t that they don’t care, it’s more likely they are being realistic in that they can’t commit the time to be truly committed to helping you. At least not at this time in their lives. 


But don’t give up, ask another person that fits your criteria. Ask as many times as you need to because a mentor can and likely will, change your life for the better.

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Why Mentoring Programs Matter

I must say, and I mean this sincerely, I am impressed with the knowledge that people newer to the workforce bring with them into their new careers. Even if it’s their first job they often bring more knowledge than workers who entered the work force 20 or 30 years ago. 

And they know it. What they don’t know is that knowledge and wisdom are two very different things. Schools and books are all about knowledge. Life is about wisdom. 

It has been said that along with age comes wisdom. I can assure you that is not always the case. Too frequently it seems that age shows up all by itself. 

But generally speaking you can gain wisdom in one of two ways. You can live a long while or you can ask someone who has to share their wisdom with you. For the purposes of our post we call that “sharing” mentoring. 

As baby boomers continue to age out of the workforce they also continue to take their wisdom with them. Many large companies have formal mentoring programs in place. They encourage their experienced employees to leave some of their wisdom behind. But some companies actually “dispose” of that wisdom. They “encourage” or even force their more experienced people, and their wisdom, out the door. 

It’s only a matter of time before those companies that devalue wisdom wise up and discover the costly mistake they have made. Some unfortunately are already figuring that out. But the horse as they say, has already left the corral. 

All organizations, large and small, will benefit from a formal mentoring program. Paring a mentor with incoming employees shortens the learning curve of the incoming employee. Having a mentor helps the new employee quickly apply their impressive amount of knowledge. That enables them to “earn their keep” much sooner. 

Being a mentor allows the mentor to “borrow” some of that knowledge from the new employee. Combining that new knowledge with their wisdom often reengages the mentor. It renews or increases their productivity. 

It’s a win, win, win. A win for the new employee, a win for the mentor and a big win for the company or organization. 

But there can be some potholes to look out for. Not everyone can be a mentor. Mentoring is serious stuff. If someone is not enthusiastic about mentoring then they should not be a mentor. Depending of the demographic makeup of the workforce in your particular organization that may mean mentors will be in short supply. 

You may need to allocate your mentors accordingly. Perhaps only to people who demonstrate a passion for learning and growth. Mentoring also requires a significant commitment of time, for the mentee for sure, but especially for the mentor. While they can likely mentor more than one person they can’t mentor so many that mentoring becomes a major focus of their job. They need to continue to do their job in order to maintain the credibility that is so vital to a mentor. As soon as someone says “well back when I was doing the job” they are no longer an effective mentor. They still have wisdom. They can still be a great life mentor. But their effectiveness as a career mentor within the organization has greatly diminished. 

When pairing a mentor with a mentee every pairing should be considered a trial run. They need to “click.” Not clicking doesn’t mean failure on the part of the mentee or the mentor. It’s just how life works sometimes. The mentor has to care enough about their mentee to invest a significant amount of time with them. The mentee has to trust their mentor enough to at least consider the advice they are being given. If after 30-60 days there is no “click” then it’s time to try another pairing. 

If your new to mentoring programs I’d recommend starting small. Ask a handful of experienced team members about their willingness to mentor. Don’t try to talk them into it. If they don’t care to mentor then they won’t care about their mentee and as a mentor, caring is essential. 

Select a few candidates to be mentored and ask them about their interest in having a mentor. Again, don’t force it on them. If they have no interest in learning from actual experience rather than just a book you may have learned all you need to know about that candidate’s future with you organization. 

Get started today. Don’t let even more wisdom walk out the door. One day you’ll look around and realize you have a bunch of really smart people in your company. You will also realize they don’t possess the wisdom required to put their knowledge to work. 

The Importance of a Mentor

I’ve admittedly been very fortunate to receive an excellent education. Sometimes I took advantage of the excellent opportunities to learn and sometimes I didn’t. I suppose I wasn’t that different than most students; I did better at subjects I liked and not as good at the ones I didn’t. 

My education made it possible for me to make a living. It didn’t really do much to help me make a life. 

Making a life required a whole different level of education. A level that can only come from a mentor. As fortunate as I was to have a formal education, I have been, throughout my life, blessed to have excellent mentors. 

Knowing what I know now, if my younger self had to choose between a formal education or a series of outstanding mentors I’d go with the mentors every time. That’s because working to make a living often doesn’t open a door to making a life. However, working to make a life often opens the door to earning a living. 

You can make resolutions forever and accomplish nothing. You can set squishy goals and mushy plans til the end of time and they will lead to nowhere land. Or…

You can get serious about building the life that was meant for you. The first step in that process is getting yourself a mentor. A good mentor. A mentor who cares about you. A mentor who cares so much that they will be honest with you. Even when it hurts. 

As you begin your search for  mentor here are a few things to keep in mind.

Your mentor should be enthusiastic about being a mentor. They should be passionate about helping others, namely you. The reward they seek should be in seeing you grow and become successful. Don’t attempt to drag someone into a mentoring role, if they aren’t all in from the beginning it’s likely they will never be all in for you. 

A good mentor should help lead you where you want and need to go. They should align with your needs, your desires and your talents. They should not push you to be a clone of themselves. They should be focused on helping you be the best version of yourself. 

A good mentor will push you out of your comfort zone. They know that “comfortable” is the enemy of growth. They will encourage you to try new things, to experiment and even to fail. 

Your mentor will need to know you, maybe even better than you know yourself. That means they will be an excellent listener. They will not allow themselves to be distracted when listening to you and they won’t be afraid of a little silence while they are considering what you’ve said. 

Good mentors provide great feedback. They “tell it like it is.” They may not always provide you with the feedback you were hoping for but that’s actually a sign of a mentor who cares. 

The best mentors I’ve had in my life seldom told me straight out I was wrong. They asked question after question to open my eyes so that I could see I was wrong without being told. Those were the “lessons” that really stuck with me. 

When you’re mentor “shopping” look for a person with those traits and abilities. When you find one ASK them about their willingness to mentor you. Ask if they would be willing to help you grow into the person you’re capable of becoming. 

You may be able to go it alone but you are FAR more likely to reach your full potential if you have a little help along the way. 

Mentoring Future Leaders

Here’s a little secret most consultants, especially those who “teach” leadership, don’t want you to know. 

Leadership cannot be taught, it must be experienced. 

You can teach people about the various characteristics of effective leaders. You can teach them about personality types and how that determines a person’s response to different leadership styles. You can teach them about those different leadership styles and when to apply them. 

You can and should teach them all of that. But you can’t actually teach them to use any of it. They must see that knowledge in action and they must experience what it feels like when they are led. 

That’s why one of the most important parts of any future leadership development program has to involve the current leadership. Every leader, every single leader in an organization must be involved in mentoring the organization’s future leaders. 

Every senior level leader should be mentoring a mid-level leader. Every mid-level leader should be mentoring an entry level leader. Yes, that means people being mentored are also mentoring others. That all assumes of course that the leadership mentors are indeed effective Authentic Leaders. Assigning a poor leader as a mentor might actually be worse than letting a new leader figure it out for themselves. 

If you think you can send a person to some leadership classes and then sit back and watch them lead then you need to seriously reconsider your thinking. You can learn about leadership in a classroom but you only learn to lead by seeing and experiencing leadership in action.

Most people lead the way they were led. A great leadership class or even a lengthy leadership program doesn’t do much to change that. That’s a shame but it’s also reality. If a person was led by poor leaders throughout their careers then it’s very likely they will be a poor leader themselves. That’s because their “model” of leadership was poor. 

People learn about driving in a classroom but they learn to drive by driving. You can’t learn to fly without a plane and you can’t learn to swim without water. Why anyone would think you can learn to lead without actually leading is beyond my ability to comprehend.

If you want to develop future leaders then allow them the opportunity to lead while being mentored by a proven Authentic Leader. Any other type of leadership “training” will miss the mark. 

Leadership Slippage

I recently received a call from a very effective sales leader. He was frustrated with the recent performance of his sales team and wanted to talk about a couple of his people in particular. I asked how many of his people he thought were underperforming and he said that actually all of them were but some were doing worse than others. 

I asked him what he thought was going on and he said he wasn’t sure. That’s what he wanted to talk to me about. He was surprised when I said that while I didn’t know exactly where the team went off the rails I was pretty sure I knew the source of the problem. 

I’m thinking he wasn’t too happy when I told him that he was the likely source. 

As with most sales leaders he has always accepted part of the credit for his team’s success. But it must worth both ways. If you’re a sales leader the first place you should look if all or most of your team is underperforming is in the mirror. 

Think if it this way. There is only one thing all your salespeople definitely have in common. Your salespeople are all unique individuals. Depending on the structure of the sales organization they may even sell different products to different markets.

The sales leader is the one thing they definitely have in common. That’s why when an entire sales team is slipping I look at the leader. 

I asked him what HE was doing differently. He said he was doing what he always had. He hadn’t changed and neither had the level of leadership he provided to his team. So we started talking back and forth and I eventually asked about his conversations with his team. He said he had asked several members of his team where they were struggling. He asked about specific customers and where in the sales process they were with particular prospects. 

He said that only added to his frustration because they didn’t seem to know. 

I stopped him cold when I asked him, “when did YOU start accepting ‘I don’t know’ as an acceptable answer?” I pushed my point by asking him when he had stopped holding his team accountable for knowing every detail about their territory and their customers. 

He said he didn’t realize that he had. 

That is an incredibly common mistake among all leaders. Leaders have the same ability to slip into bad habits as the people they lead. Authentic Leaders encourage their people to analyze their own performance from time to time but forget that they must do the same. 

When was the last time you paused to ask yourself the following questions? What’s working for you? What’s not working? What good habit have you let slip away? Have you replaced it with a bad habit? What circumstances have changed that you have not adjusted to? How have you positively impacted the people you lead in the last 30 days? 

It’s human nature for some slippage in performance to happen from time to time. That’s where having a coach or a mentor can really come in handy. They can help you identify the slippage before it becomes a problem. If you’re not willing to ask yourself those questions a caring mentor will. 

What many people in Leadership positions don’t realize is that slippage can happen to them as well as their people. That’s why leaders need mentors too. I’ve never met anyone, regardless of age, experience, or level of success who didn’t benefit from having a coach or a mentor. 

Has your level of leadership slipped lately? Slipping into occasional bad habits doesn’t make you a weak leader, it makes you a human being. Being human is a pretty darn good thing to be, especially when you’re trying to lead other humans.

Your Best Coach

I write from time to time on the importance of having a coach or a mentor. The best mentors show you what to do and how to do it. They don’t do it for you.

At some point all successful people did something to make themselves a success. They likely had a coach or mentor but they had to make the effort to act on the advice they received. THEY HAD TO ACT THEMSELVES!

Taking action to accomplish something requires a whole different kind of coach. It requires a “self-coach.” That would be you!

At some point you must push yourself. You must accept responsibility for your actions and decisions. What you’re taught can’t help you if you don’t apply it. The best advice in the world falls flat if you don’t use it.

If you do nothing then nothing is exactly what you should expect in return.

If you’re a good self-coach then you’re setting goals for yourself. Long-term, medium-term goals and short-term goals. Those short-term goals can be daily or even hourly. As an excellent self-coach you turn large, seemingly insurmountable tasks into a series of smaller tasks that you can accomplish on a daily or weekly basis.

That old city in Italy wasn’t built in a day and neither is long-term success. Doing a little each day will most definitely help you achieve a lot over time.

That’s the best thing about being/having a great self-coach…they are with you every day, all day.

The challenge with your self-coach, or your inner-coach, or whatever you want to call it, is the same as it is with a mentor or outside coach. You MUST listen to their advice and then act on it.

A single pound of action is worth more than a ton of good intentions. One thing highly successful people have in common with less successful people is that they both have good intentions. What most often separates the highly successful people from the less successful is that the most successful people act on those intentions.

So follow this coaches advice and ACT!

Do You Have the Time to Lead?

I consistently hear leaders, or perhaps I should say people in leadership positions, say that they cannot afford the time required to mentor, coach and develop their people. They are too “busy” doing other things. 

 

These types of leaders frequently say that their people are their organization’s greatest asset. Watch them for a week however and you would see almost no evidence to backup that statement.

 

Leaders who believe they cannot afford the time to develop their people miss the fact that the primary responsibility of leadership is building people. 

 

Leaders don’t lead companies, they lead the people who make up the company. Leaders don’t lead budgets, they lead the people who manage the budget. Leaders don’t lead plans, they lead the people who follow the plans. 

 

Everything in an organization or business is managed except for the people. The people within an organization or business are responsible for every bit of that organization’s success. Those people need leadership. 

 

Authentic leaders understand that they manage things and lead people. They know that the difference between leadership and management is far more than semantics. They realize that people who feel managed will be significantly less engaged. The morale of people who feel managed will be lower then the morale of people who are led. The growth of people who are led is much greater than that of people who feel managed. In fact, people who are managed have virtually no real growth opportunities. 

 

If you’re in a leadership position and you are not investing a significant portion of your time to coach, mentor and develop the people you lead then you are missing the boat on leadership. 

 

Developing your people is not a question of having the time. It is a question of priorities. If you’ve been telling yourself that you don’t have the time to lead then perhaps your priorities are a bit off. 

 

Make developing your people the priority it needs to be and your leadership will have no end. Fail to develop your people and your leadership will have no beginning. 


The choice is yours to make. Will you choose to Lead Today?