Tag Leadership

The Trap of Lazy Communication

Steve Keating Leave a comment

There are a lot of ways a leader, people in general actually, can cause communication to go sideways. Perhaps the biggest is simply not communicating often enough. Assuming people know what you’re thinking and therefore you don’t need to communicate much, is often the fatal flaw of what could have been a successful leadership tenure.

Another huge mistake is assuming that simply because they delivered a message it was received. Believing that what you said is the same as what other people heard has caused more problems then we could ever list here. World War One was basically started over a miscommunication. If you have ever been part of a conversation where the other person said “well you said this” and you responded with a “no, I didn’t say that” then you have been involved in a miscommunication.

Still another mistake is thinking that effective communication is a 50-50 proposition. If you do your part to talk and listen well and the other person does their part to do the same then you’ll always have successful communication. But let’s look at that another way, each of you giving 50% effort will result in crystal clear communication? Really? 

The most successful communications happen when both parties accept 100% responsibility for the success of the communication process. Both parties choose their words to help the other person understand exactly what they are trying to say. If one side of the communication is trying to use “big” words to sound more impressive then they are limiting the success of the communication. I’d rather be thought of as a simpleton who communicates very well than a genius who can’t get their point across. 

Both sides of a communication must listen intently, lingering on the words of the speaker until they are 100% certain they understand the message they were intended to convey. If not, it is the listener’s responsibility to ask for clarification. But…it is also the speaker’s responsibility to ask the listener if they “got it” before continuing the conversation. That’s the 100-100 proposition of effective communication. 

These “rules for clarity” also apply to written communication. Don’t assume because you wrote something with one meaning in mind that your reader will interpret it in the same way. Remember, readers can’t see your body language. They can’t hear your tone of voice and they have no idea how hard your hitting those keys on your keyboard. 

Here’s a pretty darn good rule for effective written communication. NEVER send a text or email while you’re angry. One night’s sleep can make for a much more measured response and a response that you’re much less likely to regret. 

So here’s the thing about this entire post. I’d be shocked if there is anything in this post you don’t already know. That’s the case with most of my posts. The question is, as always, are you using what you know? Do you often skip some, or most, of those “rules for clarity?” Do you assign 50% of the responsibility for successful communication to someone else? Are you assuming that because you said it “they” heard it? 

It’s easy to get lazy in our communication with other people. That laziness often puts us in a hole that can be hard to get out of. Don’t dig yourself a hole. Think a few seconds before you say it or write it. Listen to it with the other person’s ears. Read it with their eyes. Put yourself in their shoes and ask how you would reply if someone said that to you. AND BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF ABOUT THAT! 

Effective communication is the heart of successful relationships. Be they business oriented or very personal in nature, the best communicators have the best relationships. Always been that way and I suspect it always will be that way. 

Think about it. 

Want more of LeadToday? I’m changing things up on my Twitter feed for subscribers. On March 2nd I began publishing two videos each week focusing on an element of Authentic Leadership. I’ll post these videos each Tuesday and Thursday morning. They will be about 10 minutes long so we can get into the topic in a more meaningful way. The investment for subscribers in still only $5 a month. That’s for at least 80 MINUTES of quality video content on leadership a month. 

If you’re interested in taking a look head on over to my Twitter profile page. If you’re not a follower yet just hit the follow button. It will change to a subscribe button and once you hit that you’re on your way. You can cancel at any time you’ve decided you have nothing left to learn about leading the people who you count on for your success. 🙂

Here’s the link to my Twitter… https://twitter.com/leadtoday 

Why Do You Want to Lead?

Steve Keating 3 Comments

I was approached recently by someone asking if I would be their mentor. I already mentor a small handful of people and I take that responsibility very seriously. So I am selective about who I can invest my time with. 

First we need to “click.” If we can’t get along then neither of us will accomplish much. I also always approach mentoring with the knowledge that if the mentee isn’t willing to make changes in their life then I won’t be able to do anything to help them. Improvement and growth require a willingness to change. No one changes anything about themselves until they see a need. That’s one of the best things a mentor can do for someone, help them see a need to change something. 

So I asked the person who was looking for a mentor a few questions. I’d bet they are in their early 30’s. They have had a few jobs since college and each new job has come with the opportunity for advancement and increased pay. But in each case the opportunities have not been realized and the person thought a mentor could “give them an edge” when it comes to receiving a promotion. 

They said what they wanted was to earn a leadership position. I liked hearing the word “earn” because it told me they knew they would have to work for their new position. Then I asked why they wanted a leadership position and that’s when we went entirely off the rails. 

They said they had been taking orders for their entire career and they just figured it was about time they should be giving the orders. 

Where do I begin? Well, first off, “their entire career” was around 10 years. I’m not overly impressed with that. But I suppose when that’s a third of your life it seems like a long time. The bigger problem was of course the “giving orders” part. 

I asked several more questions. I determined that this person had worked for several bosses but had likely never actually worked with a leader. Their impression of leadership was someone in a position above them telling them what to do and when to do it. 

That’s a big problem. Most people in leadership positions lack any type of formal leadership training. So they “lead” the way they have been led. 

I asked one final question. I asked, “what are you willing to change about yourself in order to authentically lead the people you are responsible for?” Their answer is what ended our discussion. They said, “as a leader it’s not my job to change, my people need to change to suit me. That’s the kind of leader I want to be.”

I won’t be working with that person. I determined that they didn’t really want to learn. They had an rigid understanding of what leadership meant to them and they didn’t display much interest in Authentic Leadership. 

So for anyone interested in moving into a leadership position let me suggest that you first ask yourself “why do I want to lead.” There can be several good answers to that question but one of them must be “so I can help others learn, grow and succeed.” 

Authentic Leaders don’t aspire to a leadership position. They aspire to become a person worthy of leading others to their full potential. They don’t hope to hold a position that people will want to follow. They work to become someone that others will want to follow, whether they have a leadership position or not. 

If you’re interested in helping others grow then leading people will be very rewarding for you. If you’re only interested in giving orders then I would suggest a career as a short order cook. Then you can yell “order up” all day long and not offend a single person. 

Want more of LeadToday? I’m changing things up on my Twitter feed for subscribers. Beginning March 2nd I’ll be publishing two videos each week focusing on an element of Authentic Leadership. I’ll post these videos each Tuesday and Thursday morning. They will be about 10 minutes long so we can get into the topic in a more meaningful way. The investment for subscribers in still only $5 a month. That’s for at least 80 MINUTES of quality video content on leadership a month. 

If you’re interested in taking a look then head on over to my Twitter profile page. If you’re not a follower yet hit the follow button. It will change to a subscribe button and once you hit that you’re on your way. You can cancel at any time you’ve decided you have nothing left to learn about leading the people who you count on for your success. 🙂

Here’s the link to my Twitter… https://twitter.com/leadtoday 

Leadership Intangibles 

Steve Keating 1 Comment

I was talking with a colleague a few days ago and they asked me about which of the “leadership intangibles” are most important to the success of a leader. I think my answer surprised them, it likely disappointed them as well. 

That’s because my answer was there are no leadership intangibles. None. Zip. Nada. 

Everything my colleague believed to be an intangible of leadership must in fact be vividly tangible. For instance, they believed that caring for their people was an intangible of effective leadership. 

It’s the exact opposite. Authentic Leaders stand ready to demonstrate, in every possible manner, that they care deeply about the people they lead. They live the principle that says, “you can care for people without leading them but you cannot lead them without caring for them.” While anyone in a leadership position can say they care about their people, Authentic Leaders have no need to say it, they are demonstrating it with every conversation and every interaction. 

Giving recognition was offered up as another intangible of leadership. It is not. Giving recognition is an intentional and very visible act. If your people don’t realize that you recognize their commitment and effort then it’s the same as not recognizing them at all. 

I literally recommend that leaders put reminders on their smart phones so that they don’t go a single day without providing recognition to at least one of their people. As publicly as possible. When a person in a leadership position tells me that can’t find a reason to recognize their people every day I suggest they look harder…or sometimes just look. Quality effort is waiting to be recognized and once it is, it becomes much more visible.

Leaders who are quick to publicly recognize their people also never publicly admonish them. They keep their constructive coaching private. That’s critical because their people know that if the leader will publicly throw one of their people under the bus they will likely throw any of them, or all of them, under the same bus. 

Integrity was suggested as the ultimate intangible of Authentic Leadership. I was particularly flummoxed with this suggestion. Integrity has been given many “definitions.” It is said to be doing the right thing even when no one is watching. It has been described as “acting in a way that benefits many people rather than yourself. 

I take no issue with most of the definitions I’ve seen for integrity. But here’s the thing, leaders lead by example whether they know it or not. Their people are always watching. One element of integrity is doing what you say you will do. When you said you would do it. How you said you would do it. EVERY single time. Authentic Leaders know that they either have integrity ALL THE TIME or they don’t have integrity any time. Their integrity is public, visible, intentional and very very tangible.

As an Authentic Leader you don’t get to have any “intangibles.” All your actions are on display for your people to see. They will eventually know your thoughts as well for those thoughts will become your actions sooner or later. 

You lead by example. You lead by example. You lead by example. Remember that, counting on “intangibles” to help you lead will result in very limited leadership. As a leader your qualities and characters are always on full display for your people to see. Make sure they are seeing your best ones. 

Want more of LeadToday? I’m changing things up on my Twitter feed for subscribers. Beginning March 2nd I’ll be publishing two videos each week focusing on an element of Authentic Leadership. I’ll post these videos each Tuesday and Thursday morning. They will be about 10 minutes long so we can get into the topic in a more meaningful way. The investment for subscribers in still only $5 a month. That’s for at least 80 MINUTES of quality video content on leadership a month. 

If you’re interested in taking a look just head on over to my Twitter profile page. If you’re not a follower yet just hit the follow button. It will change to a subscribe button and once you hit that you’re on your way. You can cancel at any time you’ve decided you have nothing left to learn about leading the people who you count on for your success. 🙂

Here’s the link to my Twitter… https://twitter.com/leadtoday 

Leadership Fixers

Steve Keating 3 Comments

As I’ve written almost endlessly not everyone who occupies a position of leadership are actually leading. They are leaders in name, title, or position only. 

One of the characteristics of these types of leaders is they tend to be “fixers.” Instead of giving their people a chance to learn they ‘jump in” and solve every problem for them. While the “leader” may feel better about themselves it does nothing to grow their people. While the “leader” may think they are helping their people they are more than likely demoralizing them. 

Some people will welcome their “leader” doing the heavy lifting for them. So much so they they begin to count on it. When that happens the “leader” becomes an enabler for lack of effort and initiative. The potential for growth is stopped in its tracks. 

Authentic Leaders allow their people to figure things out for themselves. They not only give them the opportunity to learn, they encourage, even insist, that they take advantage of that opportunity. 

The potential for growth is unlimited. Authentic Leaders grow more leaders. Innovation thrives. The culture is collaborative and there are few consequences for mistakes when lessons are taken from them. 

It takes discipline for an Authentic Leader to let their people make mistakes and learn from them. It takes patience to allow their people the time required to figure things out that the leader already knows. 

Authentic Leaders see helping their people learn and grow as an investment. Leaders in name only see those same things as an expense with no ROI. 

So what about you? Are you a fixer? Understand that being a fixer who doesn’t trust their people to figure things out on their own and a well intentioned fixer who thinks they are doing their people a service by solving their problems create the same outcomes. 

Don’t limit your people. Don’t prevent them from growing. Let them figure things out on their own. Even if it takes longer than if you just did it for them. Letting your people learn is not an expense, it quite possibly may be the best investment you’ll ever make. 

Overcoming the Frustration Challenge

Steve Keating 1 Comment

It’s a fact that sometimes people are promoted into leadership positions when they have, shall we say, some shortcomings. At least some perceived shortcomings. 

How you react under those circumstances says a lot more about you than it says about the person in the leadership position. It is common for a person being “led” by someone they feel is unqualified to hold a leadership position to “resist” that person. 

Resisting the person means at best they become a disengaged employee. At worst they become actively disengaged. 

A disengaged employee is someone who does the bare minimum required to keep their job. They make the determination that doing more than the bare minimum isn’t going to be rewarded. So they put forth a “why bother” level of effort. 

An actively disengaged employee is actually putting forth more effort. The problem is that much of that effort is focusing on being a disruption to the the organization. And a disruption to their “leader” in particular. 

I have been very fortunate to nearly always work for leaders who actually led. Yes, some were more effective than others but I learned good stuff from all of them. They each, in their own way, made me better. 

But my first “leader” right out of college might have taught me the most. Unfortunately, I learned it years after he was no longer leading me. It didn’t take very long in my first job out of college to realize that my “leader” wasn’t the smartest guy in the room. In fact, to my absolute surprise I figured out quickly that he was illiterate. He could not read or write. 

Yet he was the boss of a team of people with Electrical Engineering degrees. I was 22 years old and I had no idea what to make of this situation. Most people I told found it hard to believe that someone at his level could be illiterate. But he was. 

I found it more than challenging to take any kind of direction from this guy. I assumed that his inability to read and write made him an idiot. Then I decided, for reasons I still don’t completely understand, to make his life a living hell. I must say I was pretty good at it. 

So good in fact that it didn’t take long to find myself sitting in a conference room with an HR Rep, my boss and his boss. They told us to “work it out” and get back to work. But the way I worked it out was to leave the company and head for greener pastures. 

Over the years I thought about that boss and what I had learned from that experience. The big thing I learned was that I was a terrible team member. I might have been the best engineer on the team but I was the worst team member. I disrupted everyone with my shenanigans which were all focused on proving how much smarter I was than the boss. 

One of the other big things I learned from that experience was that just because I failed to see the strengths of my boss it didn’t mean others couldn’t see them. He had worked his way up through the company and earned the respect of the owners. They were very loyal to him. He understood their goals and worked tirelessly to help them achieve each one. He was a good “people person,” even if I didn’t realize that until it was much too late. 

It would be years before I understood one of my roles in an organization was to make the people around me better. That included the people above me in the organization. It was never going to be my place to expose any weaknesses of the people above me. My role was to identify any gaps they may have and fill those gaps with my own experience and skills. And that was regardless of whether or not I received any credit for it. It was also my role whether or not they knew I was doing it. 

It would be several more years before I would realize that in the most successful organizations everyone has that same role. That role is to find and fill the gaps of the people around and above you. That role is also in addition to everything else in your job description, not instead of. The role is not to expose gaps for the sole purpose of complaining about them. 

If you’re currently working for a leader who frustrates you the first thing you need to realize is that being frustrated is a choice. You can choose to be frustrated or you can choose to be fascinated. I’d recommend you be fascinated and curious about how a seemingly unqualified person achieved a leadership position in the first place. By working to understand that person you may discover the strengths that earned them that position. 

It’s when you identify a person’s strengths that it becomes much more rewarding to fill their gaps. Filling the gaps of the people around you also makes you a much more valuable employee…and a great team member.

Do not allow anyone with shortcomings in your organization to frustrate you. You can’t control their actions or their weaknesses. So control what you can and that’s your attitude and the level of effort you’ll put forth to be the very best version of yourself. 

And one last thing…before you even think about criticizing someone else for their shortcomings you’d better be darn sure you don’t have any of your own.

Leadership Luck

Steve Keating 3 Comments

The title of this post is really a misnomer. That’s because I don’t believe luck has anything to do with leadership. Someone may luck their way into a leadership position but they must earn the opportunity to truly lead. They especially earn the level of influence they have with the people they lead.

One of the most Authentic Leaders I’ve ever known would tell you a lucky seat assignment on a plane changed the course of his career. As a young employee of a company he happened to find himself seated across the isle from the one of the best Authentic Servant Leaders ever. He also happened to be running the company the young man worked for. 

But that’s where any luck ended. The young man would grow into an Authentic Servant Leader himself and one day succeed that Authentic Servant Leader he once sat across from. But not because he lucked into a particular seat assignment. 

He earned everything he got. Clearly he had some help along the way but he made the most of that help. He didn’t luck into positions where he could succeed, he worked himself into positions where he could succeed. 

He learned and then he learned some more. He made sacrifices and many if not most of those sacrifices benefited others more than himself. Making sacrifices for the good of the many is what puts the “Authentic” in Authentic Leadership. 

I’ve seen like a gazillion people who have occupied leadership positions. The vast majority of them are far from being an actual leader. I’ve also been blessed to know several Level Five Leaders. Not a one of them lucked their way into Authentic Leadership. 

If you’re not sure what a Level Five Leader is let me explain it this way. If a leader has had a lasting positive impact on your life then it’s highly likely they are a Level Five Leader. If you haven’t seen or talked to them in years yet you remember the lessons they showed you, it’s highly likely they are a Level Five Leader. If you’re showing those lessons to others today, then that leader who impacted you all those years ago was certainly a Level Five Leader.

If you’re in a leadership position don’t expect to luck your way into Authentic Leadership. You’ll have to work your way there. You’ll have to learn. Yes, you need to learn about the business or organization you’re in. But more important than that, you need to learn about people. People in general for sure but especially about the people you lead. 

You’ll have to make some tough calls on your way to Authentic Leadership. As you make those calls you’ll need to keep in mind that it’s the people you lead who make you a leader. It’s not your title or position. You’ll need to demonstrate your understanding of that fact even while making decisions that may have short-term negative consequences for the people you lead. 

You need to show you care about the people you lead. Even when they screw up. Even when you’re mad at them. Even when it would be easier to just go scorched earth on them. 

Authentic Leaders have tremendous influence on their people. They are aware of that fact every day. They model successful behavior for their people. They celebrate the success of their people, as much or more than they celebrate their own success. 

It’s a ton of work to become an Authentic Leader. But I’ve never known one who would say it wasn’t worth it. But here’s one thing they would never say, they would never say they were an Authentic Leader. Their humility just won’t allow it. 

So when you see one, be sure to say it for them. 

Human Speed Bumps 

Steve Keating 2 Comments

Authentic Leadership can be complicated. It’s about people and every person you lead will have the own experiences, challenges and motivations. There is no “one size fits all” leadership approach. That’s what makes it so much harder (and rewarding) than managing. We manage things, stuff like budgets, buildings and equipment. None of those things are capable of adding emotions into the mix. Maybe one day a computer will tell you that you’ve hurt it’s feelings by yelling at it but that’s not a problem today. 

It most certainly can be a leadership issue when dealing with people. 

As complicated as Authentic Leadership can be, ineffective, unauthentic leadership is even more complicated. That’s because lesser leaders mess up leadership all the time. It’s easy to do but some lesser leaders seem to go out of their way to make it harder than it needs to be.

One of the biggest mistakes lesser leaders, poor leaders, leaders in name only, or whatever you want to call them make is they treat the people they are supposed to be leading like human speed bumps. 

They throw them under the bus at the first sign of trouble. 

These lesser leaders commonly use words like “fault” “blame” and “screw up.” They have their scapegoats all lined up before a mistake or failure happens. As they get older their index finger becomes crooked from so often pointing it at others. 

Authentic Leaders know that when a team member underperforms there are only two options. The first is that the team member is in the wrong role. The second is that they, the leader, did not give the team member the tools and training needed to be successful. Either way, it’s at least partially on the leader. 

Some of you will strongly disagree with that previous paragraph. You’ll say that you’re not responsible for growing your people. You’re not responsible for their poor attitudes. You’re not responsible for their lack of motivation. You’re not responsible that they can’t understand your directions. 

What you’re really saying when you’re saying those things is that you’re not responsible for anything. You’re saying that you are not an Authentic Leader. When you say those things often enough, people, especially the people you’re responsible for leading, will begin to believe it. 

Throwing your people under the bus is a massive failure of leadership. Not only will you have lost the commitment of the individual you’ve dumped on, the remainder of your team will just be waiting for their turn under the bus. 

You’ll have done that! You WILL be responsible for that, whether you’re willing to accept that responsibility or not. 

Authentic Leaders give most of the credit for success to the people they lead. They also accept a disproportionate amount of the responsibility for any shortcomings that may happen. They earn the commitment of their people by doing that. They minimize the chance of future shortcomings by doing that. They grow their people by modeling successful attitudes and actions. And they never, never, ever, use them as human speed bumps.