Tag Giving Back

How to Be a Difference Maker

Steve Keating 2 Comments

I recently left a company I had worked at for many years. I had fully intended to work there at least a couple more years, but I decided it was best to leave instead. I left for one main reason: I was no longer able to make a difference there.

The values of the company had changed dramatically over the last couple of years. There were lots of new faces and attitudes. I was shocked at the willingness to cut corners on ethics and at the unwillingness of newer people to learn the principles that had made the company great for over 100 years.

At that stage of my career, my main goal was to help others succeed. Once I determined that was no longer going to happen there, I knew it was time to go. I needed to be somewhere I could have an impact.

One of my strengths is that I’m actually a pretty average person. That means I think like most people, act like most people, and want the same things as most people. Since I want to be a difference maker, it’s likely most other people do as well.

If you fall into that category, then this post is for you.

Making a difference for people often starts with small, meaningful actions. Here are some ways that you can create a positive and lasting impact on the lives of others.

1. Practice Empathy and Listen Actively

Take the time to understand others’ perspectives without judgment. Sometimes, listening and making people feel heard is powerful on its own. It will take time to do this but giving some of your time to others is perhaps the greatest gift you can give. That’s because once you give someone else your time, you can never get that back. Giving someone your time is a powerful sign that you care enough for them to truly want to help.

2. Share Your Skills or Knowledge

If you have expertise in a certain area, offer to help others develop those skills or solve problems. Mentoring or tutoring can empower others and boost their confidence. This is an excellent way to leave a part of yourself behind once you’re gone.

3. Volunteer for Causes You Care About

Engage with organizations or community projects that align with your values, whether it’s helping the homeless, supporting education, or protecting the environment.

4. Support People Emotionally

Being there for friends, family, or coworkers in times of need can be one of the most meaningful ways to make a difference. Small acts of kindness, like offering a compliment or checking in, can have a BIG impact.

5. Be Consistent in Your Support

True change often comes from sustained efforts. Show up regularly and be reliable in your efforts to help others. This builds trust and can inspire long-term improvement.

6. Advocate for Positive Change

Speak up to bring attention to issues that matter. This might mean raising awareness about inequality, advocating for policy change, or simply educating those around you on topics they may not know about. Stick up for those who may not be able to stick up for themselves. If you can’t think of a reason to do that, try this… it’s simply the right thing to do.

7. Practice Compassionate Leadership

If you’re in a position of influence, lead in a way that puts people first. Encourage fairness, and respect, which can create a more positive culture for everyone involved. This doesn’t mean you have to go all woke. It means being the kind of person you’d like other people to be.

8. Be a Role Model

By living with integrity, kindness, and responsibility, you inspire others to do the same. Small, positive behaviors can create a ripple effect that encourages others to make a difference too. Strive to always be the best version of yourself possible. People are always watching; be an example of excellence for them, and yourself.

You do not have to be a superhero to make a difference. You don’t have to be famous, and you don’t need a position of authority. You just need to be you. Who you are today is more than enough to make a difference in this world. You only need to decide what kind of difference you want to make.

Making a difference doesn’t require grand gestures; sometimes the most impactful changes come from everyday acts of compassion and commitment. You have it within yourself to do this; the only question is… do you have the will to do it?

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But whether you can offer support or not, I’ll continue to try and write a blog that gives back, informs and sometimes even entertains. I hope you enjoy it!

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Beware of the Takers

Steve Keating Leave a comment

I love giving people. Givers are those who freely give of themselves without expecting a thing in return. They simply love being helpful to others. In my opinion, the world would be a better place if we had more pure givers in it. Unfortunately, we also have people who are predominantly takers.

Truth be told, there are people who both give and take. This post isn’t about them. This post is about people who take, take, and take some more. They use people. They get what they can from other people and then leave them in their dust. They ghost people with not a care in the world for any emotional damage they may have caused. They take advantage of anyone they can.

Being taken advantage of can feel frustrating and disempowering. Takers can make you feel insignificant, and they can rob you of your self-respect. The good news is that there are steps you can take to set boundaries and protect yourself from them.

Here are some ideas to help you make sure the takers of the world don’t take too much from you.

1. Recognize the Signs

Over-commitment: Constantly saying “yes” to favors, even when it’s inconvenient.

Unfair exchanges: Others benefiting more from your kindness or work than you do.

Feeling resentment: Regularly feeling drained, unappreciated, or obligated.

2. Build Self-Awareness

Understand your patterns: Reflect on why you allow people to take advantage of you. It might stem from a desire to be liked, fear of conflict, or people-pleasing habits.

Know your worth: Recognize that your time, effort, and feelings are valuable. When you value yourself, it becomes easier to say no.

3. Set Clear Boundaries

Define limits: Decide what is and isn’t acceptable for you in terms of time, effort, and emotional energy.

Be firm and direct: When someone asks for too much, say “no” without guilt. You don’t need to explain yourself excessively; a simple, respectful refusal works.

Example: “I’m sorry, I can’t help with that right now.”

4. Practice Assertiveness

Communicate clearly: Use “I” statements to express your needs. For example, “I feel overwhelmed when I have too many responsibilities” is a non-confrontational way to set boundaries.

Stick to your decisions: If you’ve said no, stand by it. Some people might push your limits, but consistency is key.

5. Stop Apologizing Excessively

Avoid guilt-tripping yourself: Don’t feel the need to over-apologize when you set boundaries. You have the right to prioritize your needs and time.

6. Know When to Distance Yourself

Reduce contact with chronic takers: If someone continues to disregard your boundaries or exploit your kindness, it may be necessary to limit your interactions with them.

7. Surround Yourself with Supportive People

Seek mutually respectful relationships: Focus on building relationships where there is a healthy balance of give and take. People who respect your boundaries will support you in your growth.

8. Learn to Delegate or Say “No”

Prioritize your commitments: Not everything requires your involvement. Delegate tasks when appropriate, or say no to things that don’t align with your priorities or well-being.

9. Develop Emotional Resilience

Recognize emotional manipulation: Stay alert for guilt trips, pressure tactics, or emotional blackmail. Recognizing these strategies helps you resist them.

Stay calm in conflict: Emotional resilience allows you to assert yourself without feeling overwhelmed by others’ reactions.

Don’t become a victim of a taker. No one can take advantage of you unless you allow them to. I realize sometimes it’s very hard to say no; sometimes it is very hard to stand up for yourself. Takers are very good at making it hard to say and do what’s necessary to protect yourself. But you can stop them. You may need to work on your self-respect, practice your assertiveness, and make conscious decisions about how you allow others to treat you.

But all of that is within your control IF YOU make the decision to control it. Take control of those areas of your life, and the takers of the world will take a whole lot less joy from your life.

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Consider supporting my efforts with a donation!
I put a significant amount of time and effort into writing a couple of blog posts each week. My primary goal is simple, to help other people. That doesn’t mean a little financial support isn’t appreciated. If you’ve benefited from my efforts and think my posts are valuable, I’d certainly appreciate whatever support you might be able to offer.
But whether you can offer support or not, I’ll continue to try and write a blog that gives back, informs and sometimes even entertains. I hope you enjoy it!

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How to Be More Generous

Steve Keating Leave a comment

It is better to give than to receive. If you’re tempted to disagree with that, then let me remind you that’s straight out of the Bible, Acts 20:35. What the Bible doesn’t mention is this interesting phenomenon; the more you give, the more you tend to receive.

But just to be clear, true “givers” don’t give to get something in return. They give because they have a generous spirit. They enjoy helping other people. They enjoy sharing what they have. They enjoy making someone else’s day. And they enjoy all that whether they get anything in return or not.

If you’re not as generous as you’d like to be, don’t worry. You can develop the “giving habit” and learn to enjoy doing for others… just because you can.

Becoming more generous is a mindset and behavior shift that involves empathy, self-awareness, and intentional actions. Here are several practical ways to cultivate a spirit of generosity in your life.

1. Practice Empathy

• Understand Others’ Needs: Try to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. By understanding the struggles and needs of others, you’re more likely to feel compassion and offer help.

• Listen More: Being generous isn’t just about giving material things; it also means being present for others. Listen without interrupting, giving people the space to share their thoughts and feelings.

2. Start Small

• Give Time: Offer help to friends, family, or neighbors with simple tasks like running errands, babysitting, or even listening when they need support. Time is one of the most valuable things you can offer because it is something you can never get back.

• Be Kind Daily: Small acts of kindness, like holding a door open or offering a genuine compliment, create a habit of generosity. These moments of thoughtfulness add up.

3. Give Without Expectation

• Detach from Recognition: True generosity comes from giving without expecting anything in return—whether that’s a thank-you or something more tangible. This helps to cultivate a spirit of selflessness. Remember, if you’re only giving to get someone in return, you’re not really giving; you’re making a trade.

• Anonymous Giving: If you’re finding it hard to detach from recognition, try giving anonymously. This removes the pressure of receiving praise or acknowledgment.

4. Donate to Causes You Believe In

• Monetary Donations: If you have the financial means, consider donating to a charity or cause you care deeply about. Choose organizations that resonate with your values and align with the kind of impact you want to see in the world.

• Non-monetary Contributions: If financial giving isn’t possible, donate items you no longer use, such as clothes, food, or books. Volunteer your skills or time to a cause.

5. Be Generous with Praise and Gratitude

• Acknowledge Others’ Efforts: Generosity can be as simple as acknowledging someone’s hard work or kindness. Offering praise boosts morale and encourages others.

• Express Gratitude: Show appreciation for what others do for you. By doing this regularly, you’re spreading positivity and encouraging a culture of mutual generosity.

6. Build Generosity into Your Routine

• Make Generosity a Habit: Schedule regular times to give—whether it’s volunteering once a month, donating a percentage of your income, or committing to daily acts of kindness.

• Set Goals: Set personal goals around generosity. This could be helping a certain number of people in a month or donating a specific amount to charity.

7. Let Go of Scarcity Mindset

• Adopt an Abundance Mentality: People who feel they have enough in life, whether it’s time, money, or love, are more likely to give freely. Trust that by being generous, you won’t end up with less; in many ways, you’ll feel more fulfilled.

• Recognize What You Have: Be mindful of the privileges or advantages you possess. Recognizing your abundance fosters a mindset of sharing what you can.

8. Be Generous with Forgiveness

• Let Go of Grudges: Offering forgiveness to those who’ve wronged you is a generous act that benefits both parties. It promotes healing and reduces negativity.

• Be Kind to Yourself: Forgive yourself for past mistakes. When you’re more compassionate toward yourself, it becomes easier to extend that compassion to others.

9. Share Knowledge and Skills

• Mentor Someone: Share your expertise with someone who can benefit from it. Mentorship, advice, and coaching are invaluable gifts that help others grow.

• Teach What You Know: Offer to teach a skill to someone who wants to learn, whether it’s cooking, budgeting, or a professional skill. Sharing knowledge empowers others.

10. Be Open-Hearted and Vulnerable

• Give Emotional Support: Generosity doesn’t always require material gifts. Being emotionally available and sharing your feelings and thoughts with others can foster deep connections.

• Offer Encouragement: Uplift those around you by offering words of encouragement, especially during difficult times.

If you’ve read each one of those bullets thoughtfully, I’ll bet you’re a little surprised at how much you have to give. No matter what your bank account tells you, it’s possible for you to give and give generously. You only have to decide that you will.

Generosity is a continuous practice that becomes easier and more fulfilling the more you engage in it. By giving more freely—whether it’s your time, resources, or kindness—you contribute to making the world a more compassionate place, a better place. You, yes you, can make the world a better place; see, it truly is better to give than to receive.

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I put a significant amount of time and effort into writing a couple of blog posts each week. My primary goal is simple, to help other people. That doesn’t mean a little financial support isn’t appreciated. If you’ve benefited from my efforts and think my posts are valuable, I’d certainly appreciate whatever support you might be able to offer.
But whether you can offer support or not, I’ll continue to try and write a blog that gives back, informs and sometimes even entertains. I hope you enjoy it!

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The Benefits of a Generous Spirit

Steve Keating 5 Comments

Sir Winston Churchill said “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.”

No matter how much or how little you have, you have something that you can share with others. That something has the potential to change someone’s life for the better. IF you’re willing to share.

There are many logical reasons to give. It has been proven that giving can lower your blood pressure. It reduces the stress in your life. You will experience less anxiety and giving helps keep depression at bay. It also increases self-esteem.

But here is the best reason to make a difference in the life of someone else…because you can.

Some of you reading this are saying to yourself I’d give if only I had something to give. But as I said before, you absolutely have something to give. You only need to broaden your perspective about what you have that is valuable.

During this particular time in history there are many people experiencing profound loneliness. They would love for someone to talk with. If you have a willing ear and a mouth that works then that someone could be you.

I’ll bet there is an organization in your community that is matching up willing “givers” with people who could use a bit of conversation to brighten their day. If you Google it you can find that organization. 5 or 10 minutes a day to do a little good, maybe a lot of good, maybe even save a life.

That’s just one of a million ways you can give back this very day!

Still some of you are saying I’d do that if only I had the time. As anyone who has ever heard me do a Webinar on “Using Your Time Effectively” time is just an excuse for people too busy…or lazy, to make a real excuse.

You have plenty of time to do everything that is a priority in your life. And this is a bit off topic but if you have more than a small handful of priorities in your life then you probably don’t have any real priorities.

You might be thinking I can’t “spend” time giving back because I have kids, work, homeschooling, plus tons of stuff. So DON’T SPEND time on anyone, instead “INVEST TIME” with everyone in your life.

That change of mindset will improve every relationship in your life.

The benefits of giving far outweigh whatever perceived “costs” there may be. You don’t need money to give, you don’t need some special gift or skill to give. You don’t need more time in the day to give.

You just need a willing heart and a desire to help.

Giving to others is one of the nicest things you can do….for yourself. I think you deserve it, don’t you agree?

Are You Keeping Score?

Steve Keating 4 Comments

Every year in the United States millions of Christmas Cards are sent through the mail. My mom used to send a ton of them. Each year she would keep track of who she sent cards to and who she received cards from. 

 

I asked her once why she kept track of who we were receiving cards from and she said it was so she would know who to send cards to the next year. I guess I assumed we just sent the cards to our family and friends but it turns out that was only half true. The whole truth was that we sent cards to family and friends who sent cards to us. 

 

My dear mom was keeping score. 

 

Dale Carnegie said, “If you do something for someone else never remember. If someone else does something for you, never forget.” 

 

His point was pretty simple, don’t keep score!

 

If you’re giving a gift with the expectation of receiving one in return then you’re not actually “giving” a gift, you’re making a trade. If you do a favor for someone for the sole purpose of eventually receiving a favor in return then that is not a favor, that’s a barter. 

 

I could write a lot more on this topic but I don’t need to because someone else already did. 

 

To me, the bible on pure giving was written nearly ten years ago by Bob Burg and John David Mann when they wrote The Go-Giver. It is a truly amazing book, really a life-changing book if you’ll give it a chance. 

 

It’s a quick read, it’s a great read, it’s an impactful read, it’s a must read. Few books provide a message with the staying power of The Go-Giver and I’ve never met anyone who read it that didn’t agree. 

 

Now, just so you know, this is about as far away from a paid endorsement as you can get, in fact, the authors have no idea I’m writing this. I just believe this book can help you. That’s all that’s in it for me.

 

If you give only to get then you’ll likely never feel that you get what you deserve. It is by giving without expecting a return that we receive far more than we could ever expect. 


Don’t keep score, just give. Give freely, give purely, and you will discover that you’ve been receiving all along.


It’s Not About You

Steve Keating 4 Comments

The week of April 10-16, 2016 is by Presidential Proclamation, National Volunteer Week in the United States. The proclamation says that this is the week “we celebrate the selfless individuals around our country who channel their civic virtues through volunteerism, and we encourage more people to make service an integral part of their lives.” 

In 2002 Pastor Rick Warren published a book entitled, “A Purpose Driven Life.” It was on best seller lists for years and by 2007 more than 30 million copies had been sold. There were lots of sentences in the book, many passages of Biblical Scripture were quoted and it is a great read to this very day.

Many people, including me, might say that no sentence in the book was as impactful as the very first one:

It’s not about you.

It is a book written by a Christian Pastor but it wasn’t written specifically for Christians. The advice and guidance provided in the book could be life changing for anyone who took it to heart. The book speaks to living your life on purpose for a purpose. I believe we all have at least one common purpose in life and that purpose is to add value to the world by giving something back. 

We give back because life is not all about us.

President John F. Kennedy said “For of those to whom much is given, much is required.” The inspiration for President Kennedy’s famous observation, can be found in Luke 12:48: “For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required.”

You may not think of it this way but your ability to simply read this post demonstrates that you have been given much, at least more than some others. Despite life’s ups and downs most of us really do have a pretty wonderful life. During national volunteer week no one is asking that you give back all that you have been given, you’re only asked to share a little bit of your wonderful life.

Mahatma Gandhi said that we should “live simply so that others may simply live.” That is the essence of giving and of volunteering. Your smallest act of giving, your smallest act of kindness, and your smallest act of volunteering could potentially make a huge difference for someone else, or, it may make it possible for them to simply live.

Just because you may not see the difference doesn’t mean you didn’t make one and just because you may not personally receive thanks for your efforts doesn’t mean that someone isn’t thankful. 

The only real reason you need for making a difference is that you can. You don’t have to change the entire world to make a difference in it. You can make a difference in the world just by making a difference in the life of one other person.

Warren Buffett is quoted as saying, “Someone’s sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.” What he meant by that is sometimes it takes a long time for a difference to be seen. You should know that today and always, the tasks you undertake for others will make a difference in their lives someday, whether you get to see it or not.

So this week we should all be planting metaphorical trees, we should water them with additional acts of volunteerism throughout the year and never forget this all important fact: it’s not about you.