Tag Evaluating Yourself

How to Know What You Believe In

Steve Keating Leave a comment

One of the questions that Charlie Kirk would frequently ask students on college campuses was, “What do you believe in?”

The question most often came early in a debate with a student who had just told Charlie that everything he, Charlie, believed in was wrong. Terribly wrong as a matter of fact.

So then Charlie would ask the student what they believed in.

In virtually every case, the student would stammer, stutter, and eventually admit they didn’t really know what they believed in. After a bit more conversation, they figured out that most of what they had “heard” about Charlie was nearly totally wrong.

Charlie pursued that line of questioning because he knew if the students didn’t know specifically what they believed in, they were susceptible to believing anything. He also knew it was very common for someone of college age to not have put much thought into what they believe. But guess what? An incredibly large percentage of people of ALL ages have never put much thought into what they truly believe and they too are susceptible to believing anything.

That’s why understanding what you truly believe in is such a powerful step toward living a purposeful and authentic life. Your beliefs shape your decisions, relationships, and how you navigate the world. But in a chaotic world filled with opinions, expectations, and distractions, pinpointing your core beliefs can feel overwhelming.

Especially when so much of what we read and see online is created in China, North Korea, or some other, less-than-friendly country. Throw in the fact that it was created for the express purpose of spreading confusion and hate, and it becomes almost impossible to know what to believe. Unless you are well-grounded by what you’re certain you truly believe in.

This post offers practical steps to help you uncover what you believe in, so you can live with clarity and conviction. So, let’s get into it.

Reflect on Your Experiences

Your life experiences are a window into your beliefs. Take time to reflect on moments that shaped you—both the highs and the lows. Ask yourself:

• What moments in my life felt deeply meaningful or fulfilling? Why?

• When did I feel proud of my actions or choices?

• What situations made me feel uncomfortable or conflicted?

For example, if you felt fulfilled volunteering at a community event, you might value service or connection. If you felt uneasy when someone was treated unfairly, fairness or justice might be a core belief. Write down these moments and look for patterns.

Identify What Sparks Strong Emotions

Your emotions are clues to your beliefs. Pay attention to what makes you angry, inspired, or deeply moved. For instance:

• If you’re outraged by dishonesty in the workplace, you might value integrity.

• If you’re inspired by stories of people overcoming adversity, resilience, or courage could be central to your belief system.

Keep a journal for a week and note situations that evoke strong feelings. Over time, you’ll see recurring themes that point to your core values.

Question the “Shoulds” in Your Life

Many of us adopt beliefs from family, culture, or society without questioning them. To uncover what you believe, challenge the “shoulds” in your life. Ask:

• Why do I feel that I should pursue a certain career, lifestyle, or goal?

• Do these expectations align with who I am, or are they someone else’s values?

For example, if you feel pressure to climb the corporate ladder but find joy in creative pursuits, your belief in personal fulfillment might outweigh societal expectations of success. Be honest about what feels authentic to you. But also be practical; you do need to earn a living, so you need to find the balance between what you want to do and what you need to do. Knowing what you truly believe in helps you find that balance.

Explore Your Role Models

Think about people you admire. What qualities draw you to them? Their courage, kindness, innovation, or determination? These qualities often reflect the beliefs you hold dear. Write down:

• Who inspires me, and why?

• What specific actions or values do they embody that resonate with me?

If you admire someone who speaks out against injustice, you might believe in standing up for what’s right. Use these insights to clarify your own principles.

Test Your Beliefs in Action

Beliefs solidify when you act on them. Experiment by making choices aligned with the values you are exploring. For example:

• If you think you value patriotism, try getting involved in serving your fellow citizens. Forget about the left, right, Democrat or Republican stuff. Serve people first because it’s people who make your country great.

• If you suspect creativity is a core belief, dedicate time to a creative project.

Notice how these actions make you feel. Do they bring a sense of purpose or alignment? If not, adjust and try something else. Action helps you refine what you truly believe.

Ask Big Questions

To dig deeper, confront the big questions about life and purpose. Set aside quiet time to reflect on:

• What do I think is the purpose of life?

• What kind of person do I want to be remembered as?

• If I had one year left to live, what would I prioritize?

These questions can feel daunting, but they cut through superficial distractions and reveal what matters most to you. Write down your answers without overthinking, and revisit them later to see what stands out.

Seek Feedback from Trusted People

Sometimes, others see us more clearly than we see ourselves. Ask close friends, family, or mentors:

• What values do you see me living by?

• When have you seen me at my best?

Their answers can highlight beliefs you might not recognize in yourself. For example, a friend might point out that you’re always the first to help others, revealing a belief in kindness and community.

Embrace Change and Growth

Your beliefs aren’t set in stone. As you grow, your values may evolve. What you believed in your 20s might shift in your 30s or beyond. Stay open to reassessing your beliefs as you gain new experiences. Regularly check in with yourself:

• Do my current actions align with my beliefs? If not, why not?

• Have any of my values changed over time?

This flexibility ensures your beliefs remain authentic to who you are now, not who you once were.

Final Thoughts

Knowing what you truly believe in is a journey, not a destination. It requires curiosity, honesty, and a willingness to explore your inner world. By reflecting on your experiences, emotions, and inspirations, you can uncover the values that guide you. Test those values through action, question inherited beliefs, especially question assumed beliefs, and stay open to growth. When you live in alignment with your core beliefs, you will find greater clarity, confidence, and purpose in everything you do.

Start small today: pick one of the steps above and spend 10 minutes reflecting. What do you discover about what you believe in? Jotting down your thoughts in a journal is a great way to keep them close by. Your beliefs are your compass—let them guide you toward a life that feels true to you.

It’s 2020! Can You See Clearly Now?

Steve Keating 3 Comments

I’ve never been clear on whether a year like 2020 is the end of the decade or the beginning of a new one. There are a high percentage of “experts” that would tell you the beginning of a decade is the year ending in 01, not 00.

I remember seeing Hubert Humphrey speak after he has lost the 1968 Presidential Election to Richard Nixon. I was very young but something he said has stuck with me to this day. He said you had to be very careful what you said in your concession speech after losing an election. He said it wasn’t your last speech of the just lost campaign, it was actually your first speech of the next, yet to be officially started campaign.

That’s why to this day I recommend to salespeople that they send a Thank You note thanking a prospect for the opportunity to earn their business after the prospect purchased from someone else. You see, that isn’t the final communication of the just lost sales cycle, it’s the first communication of the yet to be started next sales cycle.

But whether you see the New Year as a beginning or an ending it’s a pretty good time to take stock of where you are currently. Also to determine where you want to be in 1 year, 5 years, and 10 years in the future.

But the key to determining where you will be in the future is knowing where you are today. Really knowing.

Try getting directions from Google Maps without inputting a starting point. It doesn’t work. Neither does making plans for the future without seeing clearly where you’re starting from.

You must be brutally honest with yourself in regards to your strengths and weaknesses. If you can’t do that then you’ll need to find a coach or a mentor who cares enough about you to be honest for you. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time you know my thoughts on mentors….anyone, regardless of their level of success, age, or occupation will be better off having a mentor in their life.

Here’s the thing about being more successful tomorrow than you are today. You need to worry less about your weaknesses so you can focus more of your energies on developing your strengths.

If that seems counterintuitive to you don’t worry, you’re in a very large group. It’s the group most often called average. I don’t mean that to be insulting in any way. It’s just that most of us believe being better means turning our weaknesses into strengths. That is not always true. The most successful people invest less than 20 percent of their efforts trying to eliminate every weakness. They invest 80 percent of their time further developing their strengths.

There are times where those percentages won’t hold true. If you have a glaring weakness that is holding you back then you had best deal with it immediately. One example that comes to mind might be substantially below average human relations skills. If that’s the case it could affect your efforts in every other part of your life. In that case some of your strengths development will have to wait.

If you’re in that average group I’m guessing you have not invested a great deal of time over the past years to truly take stock of your strengths and weaknesses. “Truly taking stock” means more than a vague awareness of what you’re good at and what you might not be so good at. It requires a good bit of reflection. Reflecting is the only time I recommend looking to the past. I only recommend looking there long enough to learn what you can from your successes and failures. Then turn immediately to the future because that’s the only place you’ll find additional success.

How clearly you see yourself, your current situation, your current weaknesses and your current strengths will determine your level of success in the future.

But hey, it’s 2020, if you can’t see clearly now I don’t know when you will.